Are you good at practicing self-care?
How many of us actually practice true self-care? I didn’t for years. I thought I was. In my (very little) free time I would walk our dog with my husband, take the kids to the park, go on a hike, etc but I really wasn’t taking very good care of myself from a physical or mental health perspective. I worked for a nonprofit for almost 20 years. Its mission was to provide hope, healing and justice for abused and neglected children in our community. I was the director over 15 years. I did NOT practice very good self-care.
Take the vacation
I definitely did NOT work for the money. We all know most nonprofits don’t pay well. I worked for this nonprofit because I had family members who were sexually abused as children and even as a kid, I never felt they received true justice. My passion was ensuring we were able to help as many kiddos as we could.
How did that translate to self-care? It did not. I pretty much sucked at letting work go. That weighs really heavy on your mental health. You take it home. You think about what these kids have gone through and you worry that you didn’t do enough. Every. Single. Day. At least I did. I didn’t take a lot of PTO. I always left several weeks on the table at the end of the year. Was it worth it? You are asking the wrong person. To this day, even though I know better, if it came down to taking care of myself or ensuring a child received needed services, I will always choose the child.
You always hear about work/life balance. I don’t think there really is such a thing. Sometimes work requires way more of your time…sometimes your home life requires way more of your time. I don’t think it every really balances, and that’s okay. After almost 20 years with this organization, I left (that’s another story for down the road when I’ve practiced enough self-care to write about it objectively). 🙂 What I discovered after leaving was that I had truly done a horrible job of paying attention to my own body. I found out that my iron levels were extremely low. There is no telling how long it had been that way. I feel like I was exhausted daily for the past three years. I ended up on iron three times a day. Turns out, I needed a hysterectomy. I had also been in horrible pain every month for years, but I kept going and this, my friends, is where I want to tell you that we all need to do a better job of paying attention to ourselves. I have no idea how I functioned during that time period.
Self-Care Tips
- Get regular exercise
- Try to eat healthy meals
- Learn something new
- Set goals and priorities
- Find your tribe
- Practice gratitude
Since leaving the organization, I have made it a point to learn new things, work on projects that I’ve neglected and spend more time with people who bring me joy.
“If you feel “burnout” setting in, if you feel demoralized and exhausted, it is best, for the sake of everyone, to withdraw and restore yourself.” – Dalai Lama
I know a lot of you out there are a lot like me. It’s hard to leave work at the end of the day knowing there is more to do. Guess what? That work will still be there tomorrow and the world won’t end if you go home, eat a great meal with your family and take a vacation. Until next time, my friends…..
